Anger Management

There are certain common themes in a workplace. In this case, I am naming the emotion, Anger.

When I first started at my current company, International Press (IP), I had come off of working at AEFA as a financial advisor, which really just means "salesperson" from 8-8. Twelve (12) hours a day, including Saturday phone clinic and after-hour appointments with prospective and actual clients. Oftentimes working 70-hour weeks and receiving the draw/minimum wage/commissions. It was all about results, clients acquired and money invested. "How many set???" If you weren't producing, you weren't valuable. All the talk was about numbers, and if you didn't make the goal, you were chastised and treated like a child who didn't do her homework. How childish of me to assume that there might be "financial advising" involved.

There were bonuses, of course, to having any sort of challenging job. I learned the essence of time management, priority management, awareness of the fact that people do try to take advantage of you, how to feel comfortable talking to the common public, professionalism, accountability, image, and so-forth. It has definitely helped me in my role at IP.

First off when I entered the doors of IP as an employee, I played it the naiive, Zen way and believed, lightheartedly, that this was a nearly perfect job. After all, it was 9-5, with an hour break, small number of employees (3 of us onsite), where any ideas could possibly be put into action. I saw, and still do, see a lot of potential in the company, and my own job description. A place where I can interact with many different people from all over the world, of different professions, from highly regarded university professors of all backgrounds to outsource agents in India and across the world, to printers, to high school and college interns (interviewing is so fun, I just wish I could chit-chat forever), the list goes on.

What's more, my manager is a great guy, really laid back and down to earth. He acts very professional and has a good reasoning sense, so I think of him as a role model who doesn't jump down my throat for results and status checks.

However. Yes, the law of balances kicks in right about now. The second co-worker of mine is what I hadn't prepared myself for. We've all heard of the office "bully," the one person who seems to fit every category of "aggressively angry person," either in a sneaky way, or a blatant way. This woman fits both.

I won't go into the drab and excruciating details, but to come to a point, I have been seeking online advice on Search Google for "Anger Management coworker".

Web Results:

Bodhinatha Speaks on: Anger Management, an incredibly helpful article, despite the initial choke reflex. (you'll see what I mean).

Anger - Managing a Powerful Emotion, which gave me some questions to think about, that I am going to go through right now for you! Mwa-hahahahaha...

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The most important thing one can do to manage anger is to get to know this emotion and know it well. Ask yourself the following questions:

• What triggers my anger?
  
• Are there any themes in these triggers (for example, feeling condemned, feeling controlled by others, feeling rejected)?
  
• What happens in my body when I'm angry?
  
• What are my thoughts when I feel angry?
  
• What action do I feel compelled to take?
  

When you know your anger, you have a more controlled response to it. This puts you into the position of having more choices in how you handle angry situations.

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OK, here goes. What triggers my anger?
When this woman speaks to me.

Next. Are there any themes in these triggers?
I don't want to think about it.

What happens in my body when I'm angry?
Surges of warmth... :P

What are my thoughts when I feel angry?
I don't have thoughts. I feel like waves of black wash over my consciousness.

What action do I feel compelled to take?
Revenge by outdoing.

OK, so these are shitty-ass answers. I'll probably be more serious tomorrow. But I will leave with one inspiring and hopeful quote:


"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."

  - Eleanor Roosevelt

She is one smart lady.

Yours truly.